Team Time

Today has been quite the day. I started off by singing at mass for the Archbishop. Which is a pretty big deal. Because the Archbishop doesn't exactly come around and pay frequent visits to parishes or anything. My whole choir did a really great job, I'm glad for that. I came home and just wrote and wrote and wrote. Mostly essays for school, nothing good (otherwise I would have posted it here). And after I wrote and wrote and wrote I got to carve my pumpkin! I carved a pikachu. Yep. Be jealous. And, yes, I just added "pikachu" to my dictionary. Because that word is as legit as they come.
But, we all know that I'm not here to ramble on about my day. If I was just going to ramble, the point of this project would not be hitting me very well. But it is. So it's time for some untangling.


I said that I was going to untangle some more cross country stuff but I never actually did that. I tried a couple of times, but it just wasn't happening. We had our last meet yesterday, however, so I guess it's about time that I get around to it. Honestly, the thing about cross country that I need to untangle the most right now is what I am going to say to each and every one of those girls at the banquet. Over the years I've tried to teach them, to help them grow, to show them where I stand in the world, to let them know I'll always be theirs. But now I have one last speech. One last time to give them everything I have in as few words as possible. One night to show them how much they mean to me. So I guess I'm going to use my writing time today to start listing off all the things I've wanted to say to them. Here we go.


Oh jeeze I don't even know where to start. Goodness gracious. I knew this would be hard (that's why I'm starting so early) but my, oh my.


"Hey girls. I've probably already cried at some point tonight, and if I haven't yet then you can feel free to expect some tears now. Because look at us. Seriously, look around at all the faces. Look at the family you are apart of. And honestly, you don't really think about it, but you don't get as much time with the family as you'd like to. As a freshman you sit in those chairs thinking of all the years ahead of you. And you know you're going to make it through them, but deep inside you really don't have any idea of what it's all going to be like. And then you're a sophomore which is just kind of an awkward age in general where you've finally got some of the ropes down (and other ones not so down). And suddenly you're a junior and you're an upperclassman and things are finally starting to fall together but then it all changes. You're a senior, and the year that you thought would be the best turns out to be a year of looking back, of remembering all the times behind you and preparing for all the times ahead of you and hardly being able to sit down and look at right now. And I know that everyone tells you that your high school years go by fast and I know that you'll roll your eyes when you hear it again, but you'll never realize exactly how fast it goes until you're in my shoes... my tall high heeled shoes (sorry, Babs). And another thing that you'll never realize is just how much all y'all mean to me. Because, honestly, you guys have gotten me through some pretty rough times. You may not have realized it, but sometimes you were the only thing that helped me crawl out of bed in the morning. You are honestly one of the reasons that I am still living today, and I thank you for that. You guys mean the world to me. And there are a million things I want to tell you and I've already talked forever and you're probably already wishing I'd just sit back down, but that's okay. You guys can listen to me ramble for a bit longer. After all, you've always been there to listen to me. To help me smile when I feel sad, to direct me when I'm lost, to lift me up when I've fallen down. And now I'm sitting here trying to impart all my wisdom on you guys and I don't even know where to start. Uhmm. Don't drink and drive. Really girls, that's dangerous. I can't have any of you doing that. Don't do drugs. "Don't have sex, because you will get pregnant and die! Don't have sex in the missionary position, don't have sex standing up, just don't do it, OK, promise?" Alright, sorry, Mean Girls quote moment. That's a good movie. Anyway. Now I'm just rambling even more.
Goodness gracious I'm a mess."


Alright, that's all I've got for tonight, I just can't get myself past that wall that gets me into spilling everything that needs to be said. But breaking some ground was all I needed for now.


ps. I promised my friend that I'd mention her in this post about three seconds ago. I have this friend ML who is one of the most beautiful, wonderful people in the world and I am so glad that she is in my life. That's all.