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I found this amazing girl on twitter within days of creating my first account. She struggles terribly with self image and has both eating disorders and depression. I have made sure to pray for her often because I know her pain. It's terrible to look in the mirror and hate what you see. This girl looks at herself and thinks that she is ugly and fat. I've never agreed with her, and I've tried to make this known to her in the best way I could. I know that she deserves so much more than she gives herself, and I hope that she overcomes her struggles.
Today, she posted this on Instagram: http://instagr.am/p/K7EufDQfY2/
A picture of her in a bikini. With the following caption:
"so um this is a test to myself to see if I can do this so here goes; I haven't worn a full bikini in about 6 years since my eating disorder wouldn't let me, so this is kind of like a milestone in my life, lol. yep my thighs touch and are so out of proportion compared to my stomach, yes my stomach isn't as toned as it could be and yes I have scars along the tops of my thighs but all in all, right now, I'm not that bad, right? I mean a little bit more toning up and losing a couple of lbs and maybe I could even pass for decent. but idk I've realized that it's not about how other people look at me anymore, it's about how I look at myself and about being good enough for me. I probably won't ever be good enough for me but idk yeah I just wanted to see if I could do this. maybe one day this summer I'll find the courage to actually wear this on the beach in public, for the first time in 6 years. but idk. we'll see. so yeah, this is me, the real me, no breathing in, thighs touching and scars. it's all I'll ever be and maybe one day, it will be enough."
I teared up while I read this. I am so proud. It would be terribly hard to post a picture of yourself like that if you had been in her shoes - I, of all people, know. She is an absolutely beautiful girl - beautiful inside and out - and I was so proud when I saw this. My eyes were full of huge tears and I was in my room clapping and smiling my head off.
his girl took such a big step toward recovery. I've watched her struggle for years and now I get to watch her head burst through the water into the beautiful light. She is so brave.
I very much hope that this is the first step of many to complete recovery for her. God knows she deserves it.
I hope that those around her take strength from her act of defiance against her eating disorder. I will continue to pray for her in the hopes that she will continue to find this strength inside herself, just as I will pray for every single person with an eating disorder or depression in the hopes that God will lead them to the light they deserve.
You are stronger than whatever may be troubling you. You can overcome it. Lauren is just one example of a girl who defied her troubles and showed her impeccable strength. People do it everyday, and you can do it, too. You are stronger than your monsters.
"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." - Christopher Robin
And with that, I leave you. Love always, Trisha xx
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